Well, as some of you know it was my weigh in day today, and i was really really hoping to lose 2 lbs to get to my 3 stone weight loss....well that didn't happen. I'm now going to post about how it makes me feel when i have the weigh in results i didn't want, and also, what i need to remember in the future.
Right, so lets start the day with how i felt in work, and before my weigh in, which i think are the feelings i tend to neglect and push aside, when in reality these are the feelings that i really need to be keeping hold of as these are the feelings that are the ones that are going to keep me going when times are hard and i want to give up!
well, i started work this morning at 7, on my day off, so this could be the reason i am shattered at the moment so i apologise now if i make any atrocious mistakes!!
As i put my overalls on for work and they felt that little bit looser i felt good, happy, like this whole journey has been worth while and i was happy with how i was doing!
Then as i rushed home to get to class on time and change into my weigh in clothes, i felt even better, almost like i was really happy with my self which is rare!
So the whole morning i felt all these happy and proud feelings, all of which i let get taken away from me, and why?????!!!
Because the scales told me i had stayed the same!
Nothing more, nothing less, i stepped on the scales, and from that moment it was like everything had been snatched away from me!! I could have cried, i think i nearly did, i had lots of thoughts going through my head, like disappointment, confusion, sadness, even jealousy as I'd heard of how well everyone else's weigh in's went!!
Now, if you re someone reading this who doesn't have a weight problem, you'd not be wrong to think i am mad, because you know what? I agree!
Why why why on earth do i let my self get dragged down by the numbers? And it's not just me, most of us do it! But why!!
Because unless you ate a couple of big mac meals in between the happy feelings, and getting weighed nothing has changed!!! Absolutely NOTHING!!!
So this is what i need to remember every time i have had a weigh in where i am not too happy with what the numbers tell me!
IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT THE NUMBERS!!!
Not at all, do you know what it's really about, it's about how far I've come in the last year, hell it's about the fact that i am still coming to group!
It's about being a healthy wife to my husband and mother to my baby boy.
It's about not having to run to the plus size side of the shop when i go shopping.
It's about the fact that i have lost more weight than my toddler currently weights! (which feels like a tonne when he stands on your foot trust me!!!)
And it's about, and the whole reason why i am doing this, so i can walk my darling son to school with out him being ashamed of me being his fat mummy!
And that is the thought that i have to keep with me when i feel like I've got no where or when i feel like i want to give up!
And this is the part where i preach about why staying to group really is so important!
If i had left with out having the image therapy this afternoon i would have walked straight into domino's pizza, but i didn't!! Listening to so many inspirational stories, told me not to give up, i reasoned with my self in my head, worked out where i could have gone wrong and built up a plan for the week ahead, all very productive stuff! So instead of running for pizza, i went straight back to work and stocked up on healthy foods!!
i now feel ready to start this week, and hopefully nothing is going to come up to give me any blips and i can get my 3 stone another day, because you know what, it will happen, doesn't matter when all that matters is not giving up!!
Not sure if any of them will read this but I'd like to say a massive thank you to the girls at my group who keep me going, including Fay, Katrina, and of course Rachel our fab consultant! I truly think the people in our group are some very special people, and they keep me coming back! :D
Right, i'm off for some chill out time!
love and syn free chocolate sprinkles
Tracey xxx
